Polynesian Resort

Wally wanders paradise at the Polynesian Resort

- by Walter Octavius March, January 17, 2011

KUNGALOOSH!

My fellow Explorers, I'm glad to see you made it back from the Himalayas!

Wasn't that quite a trip? After all the snow and cold, I thought I'd head someplace warm and toasty for a well-deserved break. And what better place than a tropical oasis, right here at Walt Disney World. Of course I'm talking about Disney's Polynesian Resort.

The Polynesian Resort was one of the original Disney Hotels, opening with the Magic Kingdom in 1971. When it first opened, the white sandy beach out back had a wave machine facing it from the Seven Seas Lagoon. The waves were big and they reminded me of my old surfing days in Bora Bora. The waves were so big, in fact, that they eroded the beach, forcing the wonderful Disney people decided to turn off the wave machine forever.

The beach, however, is still a great place to relax and sip umbrella drinks. There are plenty of palm trees and a few have hammocks hung between them. As you walk from the beautiful beach toward the Grand Ceremonial House of this Tahitian-like paradise, you pass a volcano - yes, a Volcano!

Did I ever tell you about the time I had to save myself and a beautiful young lady from Luzon? We were walking near the crater of the Taal Volcano on the island of Luzon in the Philippines when out of nowhere the ground started to rumble. Thinking I was hungry and needed food, I reached in my pack for a protein bar.

Then I realized it wasn't me rumbling, it was the great mountain above us! We ran for lower ground. As my companion stumbled, I scooped her up, put her over my shoulder, and ran down the mountain. We made it to our boat and were just able to put up sails before the lava poured into the ocean, creating the most amazing steam cloud. As we sailed away I...

Oh, sorry, where was I? Ah, yes, the volcano at the Polynesian Resort.

It's called the Nanea Volcano and it towers above one of the resort's two swimming pools. The larger pool features a waterfall and a 142-foot tubular waterslide with a walk-in entry. The other pool, The Poly East Pool, or the "quiet pool," offers deeper waters.

As you walk from the pool area, you come to Captain Cook's, a quick service restaurant, and near there you can also find Moana Mickey's Arcade, where I spent two hours one afternoon trying to beat a video game. Finally, I conquered it!

Walking the grounds here is like being on a Pacific island. The tropical colors with the bamboo and the rattan make you feel as if you are on any of the Polynesian Islands. The resort itself is comprised of 11 two- and three-story village longhouses that contain the many guest rooms.

The Great Ceremonial house is the jewel in this Pacific paradise. It was built to resemble a Tahitian assembly lodge and houses the resort's main lobby. In the very center of the lobby there is a waterfall and an atrium with amazing foliage from the islands. What a great place to sit and relax and plan your next adventure! There is also a shop, the Bou-tiki, on the lower level of the lobby. It's the perfect place to purchase your Polynesian Resort souvenirs.

Toward the back of the lower level you'll find the Wyland Gallery where you can buy ocean prints and other art work that complements the island theme quite nicely.

The entire back wall of the lobby is glass and affords a great view of the resort grounds with the Magic Kingdom in the distance.

The upper level of the Great Ceremonial House, where I am sitting now, is open: from here you can look down upon the waterfall. The shop on this level, Trader Jack's, is connected to another shop, Samoa Snacks, which offers sundries, snacks, and adult beverages.

The upper level also boasts two great restaurants.

The first, Kona Cafe, is a wonderful place for breakfast, lunch, or dinner, and for quicker bites, the Kona Coffee and Sushi Bar is just outside.

'Ohana, near the Kona Cafe, is a large, family-style restaurant. Here I met that Alien Experiment, 626, at 'Ohana's Best Friends Breakfast with Lilo & Stitch. What a great little guy he is! The girl who adopted him has done wonders from what I understand. Although the Alien Experiment isn't here for dinner, the meal itself is unbelievable, an all-you-can-eat extravaganza with skewers of meat brought around by 'cousins' (servers) to your table. Pork, chicken, beef, and shrimp are complimented by stir-fried vegetables, fried dumplings, and lo mein noodles.

I have to admit that I finished second in the Coconut Race, but that's because the winner was a ringer, a pro, I know she was, no matter what any of the 'cousins' said.

The other meal you can have at the Polynesian Resort is at Disney's Spirit of Aloha Dinner Show held in the open air-theater on the Seven Seas Lagoon. It's a family-style luau with dancers from the Pacific Islands in traditional dress doing their customary dances.

The last time I had such a meal I was the guest of King Mai-ah Tai-ah at a Samoan ceremony where the King made me tribal warrior. I was given this great honor because...

Oh, I'm sorry...

It seems the Monorail to the Magic Kingdom has arrived - the station is right here on the second floor, you know - and so I must leave you. A tourist has told me about a rhino trying to prove a point to some of my friends taking a Jungle Cruise, and I must help them before they get theirs - in the end! I will share my Samoan story another time.

Until then, KUNGALOOSH! And keep your eyes open for Adventure!

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